NFG

"This is Peter Paray, I am at the point of not giving any fucks. I don't need a fucking narrator to set the mood or to explain the situation. This is the situation. FUCK YOU. My life is a series of fucked up events occurring at the wrong time and I don't need anyone to explain that to you. Yes, it's possible to have a change of heart, it's possible to become a totally new person, but honestly... I don't want to be that person, I like who I am! I like hating everybody, I like hating myself, I like being alone, and being frowned upon by society, that's who I am! I like getting flat tires in the middle of the night, 5 minutes away from home, with a 12 pack of beers in the car and a slight buzz (that 5 minute drive turned into an hour and a half).  I DONT GIVE A FUCK... I am who I am, nobody can change that but me, and I don't care for changing who I am, so I guess that's who I'll be forever. I don't need your approval, I don't need to be accepted. I'm angry that I feel so angry, and that angers me.. Knocking down beers by the minute, I feel sick to my stomach, but that's a feeling that I'm used to, hating my own guts as they breathe and digest for me. I'm a fucking asshole and I've accepted that. I AM PETER PARAY. Bring it on!!!!"

Incredible

If you could go back into your past, at this very moment and change ONE significant event in your life, what would it be and how would your life have been different? 

Back

As you may have never noticed. Peter has been gone for quite some time. He's been on a vacation, a sort of road trip, taking in experiences from an elevated point of view. He had taken off to see the country, to see his people in this place we call home. 

Peter sat in his dark lonely void once again. Remembering the pain, the grief, the memories that made him... Peter. He drank his cat blood and smoked his cigarette. Thinking back at all he had seen, all he'd forgotten, the faces he'd never see again. Life was a realm, and he was the King. 

Peter was sitting down watching the stars fall and planets explode when it all came to him suddenly, all his angst, his anger, his self essence... Suddenly he was sitting within his void, on his throne of old dirty laundry and forgotten photos. "It feels good to be back... Well not really, but I'm back". He listened to the motors roar and it hurt his ears. He had tried to make human contact once again and was rejected.. Once again. It all came back as fast as a flash of lightning, rising up from the ground and creating a loud thunderous roar "I AM PETER PARAY" how did he forget? He had found bliss for what felt like a year, but suddenly had turned into a few seconds. "Where did the time go? All those scenarios and landscapes that I had seen with my own eyes, felt with the very core of my essence, it all turned into one long dream. One beautiful, vivid dream". He tried to live it again but it had passed so fast.. "I'm back to where it all started," but something had changed. His anger was angrier, his disappointment was more disappointing, but more importantly, his void was darker then ever before. 

Bickering Brothers

Looking in from the inside, Peter truly understood what he's always known. Fighting with yourself to make the world your home, but no matter how hard he tried, he's never really been a part of it. Wondering if tomorrow will ever come, closing his eyes every night, thinking he'd never open them again. "I've found my peace, but I can help but wonder what it would've been like. The butterfly effect, a single word, an action, accepting her dollar for a cigarette, it could've changed tomorrow. A good deed goes unnoticed, but a bad thought never goes unpunished." He sat and relished in his foolish wisdom, so bizarre and absurd it sounded almost intelligent. "Everything happens for a reason, and it's all led to this moment, this very second." He regretted nothing and took it all in as if he knew it were coming. Peter was no saint, Peter was no prophet, but he took in life good or bad and turned it in to his twisted fate, is altered future that he called "home."